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Parent-Teacher Conference Kit

by Peggy Gisler, Ed.S. and Marge Eberts, Ed.S.

The average parent-teacher conference lasts only 20 minutes, and time sure flies when you're talking about your child! Here's how you can make the most of every minute: Choose from the situations above to get a custom list of questions to ask the teacher. Questions you should ask:

1. Is my child behaving appropriately in the classroom?
2. Are you aware that my child is finding it difficult to work with you?
3. What suggestions do you have about ways my child could improve his relationship with you?
4. Do you have any ideas about how you might get along better with my child?
5. Do you feel that a transfer to another class would be in the best interest of my child?

Tips for talking with the teacher:

1. Approach the conference with a cooperative attitude toward resolving the situation. Avoid confrontation.
2. Make a list of the positive and negative experiences your child is having at school and share them with the teacher.
3. Remember that you have only heard half of the story. Could your child be overreacting to a situation?
4. Listen carefully to your child's comments about what is going on at school and help him find ways to handle the situation.
5. Visit the classroom to monitor your child's perception of the situation.

Questions you should ask:

1. What do you think each of us can do so we will be able to work together smoothly this year?
2. Can we avoid involving my child in our differences?
3. Can we find some areas of agreement on how to help my child succeed in school?
4. Would you please give me your views on our areas of disagreement?
5. May I tell you why I don't agree with your views on ____?

Tips for talking to the teacher:

1. Bite your tongue, and make an effort to get along with the teacher. An antagonistic relationship will not help your child.
2. If you have done something to offend the teacher, be sure to offer a sincere apology.
3. Try to be open-minded about differences that you have with the teacher, and listen to his or her views.
4. Look for something positive, and praise the teacher for these efforts.
5. If it will be difficult for you and the teacher to have an effective conference, then ask for the principal, assistant principal, guidance counselor, or another teacher to be present as a mediator.

Questions you should ask:

1. What is my child's ability level?
2. What exactly do you feel is the problem or problems that are causing my child to struggle in school this year?
3. What special help can the school offer my child to get him or her on track academically as quickly as possible?
4. Would it be appropriate to test my child for a learning disability?
5. How can I help my child do better in school?

Tips for talking with the teacher:

1. Begin right away to work with your child on homework every night. Give assistance when it is required.
2. Study your child's daily papers carefully, and help her correct any mistakes.
3. Teach your child study skills such as reading directions carefully, studying examples in textbooks, and writing down assignments.
4. Collect information about your child's performance at school so you can closely monitor her progress.
5. Learn about your child's legal rights to have the school provide special help under the Americans with Disabilities Act of 1990, Section 504, and IDEA.

Questions you should ask:

1. How is my child doing academically in your class?
2. Do you feel my child is breezing through class assignments with little or no effort?
3. Could you make class assignments that are more challenging for my child?
4. Does the school have a formal program for gifted and talented children? Should my child be tested for it?
5. What can I do at home to enhance my child's educational experience?

Tips for talking with the teacher:

1. Discuss with the teacher the possibility of your child spending less time with curriculum he has mastered and more time with extension and enrichment opportunities.
2. Quite often, it falls upon parents to expand the school's curriculum in such ways that their children find it more challenging and interesting.
3. Visit Internet sites (www.nagc.org) to find ideas about how to challenge bright children.
4. Consider enrolling your child in some enrichment classes or activities either after school or on Saturdays. School districts, colleges, and museums offer this type of program.
5. Join a parents' group involved in the education of gifted children.

Questions you should ask:

1. Does my child have any friends at school?
2. Why do you feel my child is having problems socializing with other children?
3. Is there anything you can do in the classroom to help my child feel more comfortable around her peers?
4. Do you have any suggestions about what I could do at home to help my child get along better with her classmates?
5. Would it be a good idea for my child to talk to the school counselor or psychologist about ways to improve his socialization skills?

Tips for helping your child:

1. Try to make your home a friendly place that attracts children.
2. Invite a classmate to your home to play with your child.
3. Have your child participate in programs that bolster her interests and give her new skills (karate, music, scouting) and friends.
4. Let your child see you in social interactions so that she will have an appropriate role model.
5. Children with friends at school are generally better off than those without; however, solid relationships with family members, neighborhood children, and other adults are good substitutes.

Questions you should ask:

1. What grade level is my child performing on in reading, math, social studies, and science?
2. How is my child doing in relation to the rest of the class? (Is my child performing in the top 25 percent? Top 10 percent?)
3. What do you see as my child's strengths and weaknesses?
4. Could you tell me about my child's work ethic, relations with other children, behavior in class, and attitude toward learning?
5. Can you tell me what academic topics and skills will be emphasized this year in your classroom?

Tips for talking to the teacher:

1. Give the teacher extra information about your child to help him or her know the child better.
2. Express your appreciation to the teacher for the good year your child is having at school.
3. Ask the teacher if there is anything special that you could do to help in the classroom this year.
4. Talk to your child each each day about what is going on in school, and be sure to praise the effort he is putting into getting a good education.
5. Keep doing what you have been doing so your child continues to have a productive year at school.