Grown-Up Homeschoolers: Are They Succeeding?

The Proof's in the Kids
Homeschooling works. Need proof? Bring on the kids. Here's how they turned out: All grown–up and eager (well, at least willing) to talk about how homeschooling helped them become the well-adjusted, productive young adults they are today. It's the "Grown–up Homeschoolers" panel discussion at the national "Growing Without Schooling" conference in Waltham, Massachusetts.

Diversity on Display
Obviously selected for their diversity (one's a full-time college student, another's a part-time college student with a full-time job, the third's a part-time librarian who chose not to attend college) and their ability to represent the movement in front of an audience of 500, these three kids are the jewels in homeschooling's crown.

Everyone Takes a Bow
Amanda, Mae, and Tad. Throughout this hour and a half session, they nimbly answer personal questions from the panel moderator and the overflow audience. They are articulate and funny, and radiate confidence. A homeschooling mom in the audience is so moved, she asks their parents to take a bow. The parents rise and humbly receive their movement's applause. In this moment, Amanda, Mae, and Tad are everyone's children, the embodiment of succeeding against the odds, the payoff for all the legal battles, the searches for mentors, the financial sacrifices. It's all worth it.

Amanda, the Pro
Amanda works full-time at a legal publishing company while attending the University of Pennsylvania part-time. She's much in demand as a speaker on the homeschooling circuit (she fields questions like Cal Ripken fields groundballs), and has published many articles on her life as a homeschooler. She's a pro. This kid loves the spotlight.

Amanda credits her homeschooled self-discipline and independence with enabling her to balance full-time employment and a demanding college schedule. Even though she's enrolled in school now, she doesn't hold back from sharing her thoughts about homeschooling with classmates.

At the conference, she spoke of marked differences between herself and her college classmates – specifically, how they always compare SAT scores (she never took them) and worry about getting A's in courses (grades have never been important to her).

She pledges, "I am, and always will be, a homeschooler."

Mae, the Homebody
Mae chose not to attend college two years ago. She works in a library, has been selected trustee at another library, and designs Web pages. Soft-spoken and measured in her speech, she appears to be the least comfortable on stage.

Mae chooses to live at home. She's never left. Acknowledging that her peers are astonished by this preference, she says unashamedly that she likes having her parents around and enjoys watching her sisters grow up.

Mae has written, "Because my parents closed no doors, but continued to support me and to trust my needs, I was able to find a place in the community, yet keep the ties to my family intact at the same time. Neither one of these important needs--the journey toward autonomy and the guidance and support from my family--were compromised."

Mae's decision not to attend college was a difficult one. Although she knew she needed college to obtain a Masters of Library Science degree, she really wanted to pursue her interests and passions "which at the time were working part-time in the local library, playing around on computers, and writing poetry." Two years after making that decision, Mae reports, " ... except for the lack of like-minded peers in my social group, I couldn't be happier."

Tad, the Brown Poster Boy
Tad's a full-time Brown University college student majoring in public policy. He's a student government representative, has just finished a summer's legal internship in Washington, D.C., and plays in the school orchestra. His wry sense of humor and storytelling skills draw repeated laughter from the crowd.

Tad is a walking, talking recruiting station for Brown University. He loves the place! "For anyone who's interested in Brown University, I'll be handing out brochures in the lobby," he offers enthusiastically. Unlike Amanda, Tad had no initial problems feeling at home with his classmates ("I didn't push homeschooling--most kids were really interested in hearing about it").

He took immediately to Brown's homeschooling-like absence of required courses. Tad initiated independent study and research arrangements with several professors, experiencing this learning as a continuation of his self-directed homeschooling. Brown is the only Ivy League school with no core curriculum, a fact that influenced Tad's attendance. Educators have questioned whether "isolated" homeschooled kids are prepared to become top-functioning college students. Just ask Tad (and take a brochure while you're at it).

Reflections of Other Grown–up Homeschoolers
A special edition of Growing Without Schooling, a periodical from the conference sponsor, Holt Associates, contained many other reflections of grown–up homeschoolers:

"For me there came a time to stop homeschooling. I had a need to be around more people my own age more of the time. In my later teen years, my relationship with my mother had become so stressed from years of being together all the time ... . I waited too long to leave home, and when I did leave, I felt the need to go to a boarding school a thousand miles away. So, in hindsight, homeschooling needed to have more to do with the rest of the world. Isolation is a dangerous thing ..." --Nathan

"I am aware that I learn constantly: from people, activities, and books. I have never viewed learning as something that only happens during the limited hours of formal instruction. I do my academic work in my own way and at my own speed in college, just as I did at home. Unlike many of my peers, I strive to understand and retain the material we study, and try very hard not to get sucked into the unhealthy pattern of cramming for tests and then forgetting everything." --Emily

"In many ways, it was my history of homeschooling that made me attractive to many of the schools to which I applied. It was the wide range of subjects I had studied and the depth to which I took those pursuits that made me stand out among the stack of applications. One Dean of Admissions said he was thrilled at the prospect of having more students with unusual backgrounds--in particular, homeschoolers." --Christian

Successful by Any Standards
So how successful are these grown-up homeschoolers? Sure, I realize the conference panel and the written reminiscences featured the movement's best and brightest. That doesn't diminish their refreshing candor, courage, vitality, and sense of mission. They are strong of purpose, pioneers in a much-maligned movement. They remain curious, avid learners. They have become successful on their own terms. These kids are doing just fine.

Read Carleton Kendrick's bio.

More on: Making the Decision to Homeschool