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Transferring Midway Through the College Year
Q: My daughter decided to stay at home for college and since this decision, most of her friends have moved away. She is miserable and wants to transfer to a school away from home midway through the year. Should we allow her to transfer or make her wait until next year? We don't want to spoil her, but we want to have a happy home life again.
A: Encourage your daughter to look for opportunities to become connected to activities at the school she is attending. She may find outlets for her interests that will soon have her feeling very comfortable and happy in her college setting. At this point, she is in a transitional period where she is seeking new friends and possibilities.
Before you decide whether to let her transfer, have her revisit the priorities that led her to make her original decision. If her priorities have changed, then it may be time to weigh new options. As she considers transferring, it's important for her to think about long-term career goals, and to try and plan on the steps that are necessary to reach them. If she decides to make a change, I would encourage her to work closely with the counselors at both schools to facilitate a smooth transition.
Make every effort to keep the lines of communication open. Encourage her to talk with you about her feelings and concerns and be careful not to be judgmental as she shares them with you. I know that you are concerned and only want the best for your daughter. The key is for her to reach her potential.
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Del Antaki has worked as a counselor at the junior high, middle, and high school levels for many years. Before becoming a school counselor, she taught mathematics and English.